It happens so often, that people come to me hoping to find solutions to present life problems in a past life, as they are unable to see its sources in present life.
Most claim they have had a happy childhood, at least a normal one. However as we start talking, many details from early childhood are revealed, of neglect and abuse, rebuke and parents unconscious actions. Experiences which were forgotten or even justified, brushed aside growing up.
But that 3 or 7-year old is still hurt, angry, and feel devalued, denied or rejected. As its pain or hurt was suppressed, denied or simply not acknowledged by adults around us or even our adult self, which tends to justify or intellectualise past painful experiences in a hurry to act mature or in control, and not appear vulnerable. Thus the child in us never gets healed or comforted. The cycle of neglect and abuse continues unabated.
As the inner child, acts out in many ways, showing up in adult life as maladjusted behaviours, like anger, excessive self control or denial, depression, perfectionism, defensiveness or rebellion, sexual fears inhibition of sexuality, emotional numbness, lack of joy or purpose. Or beliefs like, “I’m unloved”, “I’m unimportant”, “I’m no good enough”, “I have fight for everything”, plus feelings of unworthiness and powerlessness. Unforgiven acts of betrayal and abuse.
That is when Inner Child healing comes in.
Magically as they begin to see how one childhood incident, or many changed the trajectory of their life. Sometimes what is found that a thoughtless, insensitive or even angry statement or action of parental figure carved a deep wound in the child’s psyche, through unhealthy injunctions, which need to be reprogrammed, unlearned. Injunctions like, “You don’t matter”, “You are useless”, “Money doesn’t grow on trees”, “Don’t’ cry or show emotions”, “You are stupid”, “I don’t have time for you”, “It is not safe out there”, ” World is filled with cheats and criminals”, “You cannot make decisions”, “You are good for nothing” or “Nothing good will come of you”.
Once they see it, the healing can begin..and positive qualities of the Inner Child integrated back into the adult self. Sometimes fragments of soul lost during severe trauma or abuse need to be merged back through the Soul Retrieval process. This gives the adult self a feeling of being complete, and also a fresh start. It’s possible, healing always is. What is required of us, is openness and a willingness to let go. For that often we only require self compassion.